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PostPosted: Mon Nov 29, 2004 3:34 pm    Post subject: Advice to Gamblers Reply with quote

Advice to Gamblers:

Hemingway: The Toronto Years
Hardcover
By William Burrill




Quote:
In February of 1920, Harriet Connable wrote to tell Hemingway the news from Palm Beach. Among other chit-chat, she related a story about how Dorothy (Connable) had gone to a casino with five dollars and returned with seventeen dollars' profit and a great new interest in roulette. Sensing a new opportunity to impress with his expertise, Hemingway rushed off a long letter to Dorothy explaining that he felt it was his duty to stop work on his magnum opus, "Night Life of the European Campitals, Or The War as I Seen It," to offer -- in great detail and complete with diagrams -- a treatise on his own surefire system to beat the roulette wheel consistently, a system "worked out by bitter experience in the very best gambling halls of Yarrop." In keeping with his already kindled belief in living with a code of honor, Hemingway added a note about ethics among gamblers: "Probably you aren't really interested in roulette any way. But it is the best game in the world, having the advantage over craps that in craps you are winning your friend's money and consequently it is not so much fun. But in roulette you are bucking a wheel and there are no ethics against quitting when you are ahead. You can't do that in craps or poker. It is the loser who has to say when to quit. But in roulette when you get a decent way ahead -- quit." (From p. 88 of an otherwise tiresome tome, whose equally tiresome author was once a contributor at the forgettable Canuck trombone, The Toronto Star, whose only claim to fame is that it once very briefly had Hemingway on its payroll. Hem was treated rather shabbily there, too, if the truth be told, and it isn't in this book.


Quote:


Compare Hemingway's advice with the system devised by fellow novelist Graham Greene.



A Hemingway profile we would recommend:

Life Stories
Edited By David Remnick
Audio CD (Abridged)




Great readers, including mega-Emmy winner Tyne Daly, improve the already flawless text of this collection of profiles from the best of the best New Yorker magazine. The poetry and fiction sections stink again, something they haven't done this bad this much this long, but one of these days the editor will have to change his socks. We're waiting it out:

The New Yorker
Magazine Subscription






Quote:
More on Hemingway in Cuba.

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 29, 2004 4:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Complete Essays of Mark Twain
Hardcover
Edited by Charles Neider




Aside from Letters from the Earth (see below), the literary charm of this much revered American eludes us, much as his dream to sail a riverboat up and down the mighty Mississippi eluded Sam Clements. Unlike his fiction, however, the essays have much to recommend them. Here is a sample on the subject of the gaming houses he visited while vacationing in Aix-les-Bains in the sunny south of France:

Quote:
I was never in a fashionable gambling hell until I came here. I had read several millions of descriptions of such places, but the reality was new to me. I very much wanted to see this animal, especially the new historic game of baccarat, and this was a good place, for Aix ranks next to Monte Carlo for high play and plenty of it. But the result was what I might have expected - the interest of the looker-on perishes with the novelty of the spectacle; that is to say, in a few minutes. A permanent and intense interest is acquirable in baccarat, or in any other game, but you have to buy it. You don't get it by standing around and looking on...

The thing I chiefly missed was the haggard people with the intense eye, the haunted look, the desperate mien, candidates for suicide and the pauper's grave. They are in the description, as a rule, but they were off duty that night. All the gamnblers, male and female, old and young, looked abnormally cheerful and prosperous...

The etiquette of the place was difficult to master. In the brilliant and populous halls and corridors you don't smoke, and you wear your hat, no matter how many ladies are in the thick throng of drifting humanity, but the moment you cross the sacred threshold and enter the gambling hell, off the hat must come, and everybody lights his cigar and goes to suffocating the ladies. (at pgs. 53-54).


Even better:

Quote:
Letters from the Earth
Paperback
By Mark Twain




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PostPosted: Tue Nov 30, 2004 1:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Fields for President
Hardcover
By W. C. Fields


Quote:
More Fields at the PokerPulse Gambler's Guide to Christmas - and a Happy New Year!





Quote:
I would awake each morning at the crack of noon and walk a good three miles before breakfast to the old Rittenhouse Hostelry, for men only, where the newspaper boys hung out. Then came a long afternoon of baseball, where I learned to yell "Kill the umpire" louder than anyone else in the left-field bleachers. Then back to the boys at the old "Rit" as we succinctly (meaning briefly) referred to it. After dinner I would generally occupy myself with volley ball, sometimes varying that with a firemen's or policeman's ball. About midnight I would pick out a likely-looking table and catch forty winks under it. We had no patience with mollycoddles who slept in beds in those days. Soon I'd be back at my break-neck program, and would spend the rest of the night in figuring racing forms, and often as not I'd be able to pick up some fine tips from the bookies and stable hands. It only proves what methodical physical culture can do for you. Never, my gentle readers, take any stock in the man who says, "Pshaw, I sit at a desk all day and never do anything more strenous than sign my name, and look at me -- sound as a bell, sweet as a nut. Exercise is sheer bunkum!" How many times have I heard that twaddle! Little does the average business man know about himself. The truth is that he goes through more grueling calisthenics during a work day than the most active of coal heavers. (From the chapter entitled, How I Have Built Myself into a Physical Marvel, p. 112)


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 21, 2004 4:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Roscoe
Hardcover
By William Kennedy


Quote:
More Kennedy.





Quote:
FELIX DECLARES HIS PRINCIPLES TO ROSCOE

"How do you get the money, boy?" If you run 'em for office and they win, you charge 'em a year's wages. Keep taxes low, but if you have to raise 'em, call it something else. The city can't do without vice, so pinch the pimps and milk the madams. Anybody that sells the flesh, tax'em. If anybody wants city business, thirty percent back to us. Maintain the streets and sewers, but don't overdo it. Well-lit streets discourage sin, but don't overdo it. If they play craps, poker, or blackjack, cut the game. If they play faro or roulette, cut it double. (-- p. 8)


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 27, 2004 12:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hey Rube
Blood Sport, the Bush Doctrine, and the Downward Spiral of Dumbness
Hardcover
By Hunter S. Thompson


Quote:
More of Hunter and the book.





Quote:
It is not sane to give away 33 points in the playoffs, or even in the Super Bowl - although I did, once, and I won...It was my finest day in the gambling business. The Broncos were playing the 49ers in Super Bowl XXIV & the closing spread was 11, which I gave without hesitation in a crowded Aspen bar...It is always a huge advantage, when fleecing people in public, to bet against rabid fans on their own turf. You want to do it in a loud, mocking voice that grates on the nerves of everybody within hearing range, so even your Friends will be infuriated & start betting rashly. (-- p. 23)


Quote:
See also A Fortified Compound in Woody Creek, Colorado.

DON'T MISS even the most cursory glance at the website of Hunter's longtime gonzo pal, Liverpudlian Ralph Steadman.

Fire in the Nuts indeed!



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PostPosted: Mon Dec 27, 2004 12:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Read 'Em and Weep
A Bedside Poker Companion
Hardcover
Edited By John Stravinsky




Quote:
If the axiom you are acting under is not designed to make you money, you may discover that your real objective at the game is something else: you may be trying to prove yourself beloved of God. You then must ask yourself if -- financially and emotionally -- you can afford the potential rejection. For the first will certainly, and the second will most probably, ensue.

Poker is boring. If you sit down at the table to experience excitement, you will, consciously and subconsciously, do things to make the game exciting. You will take long-odds chances, you will create emergencies, and they will lose you money. The poker players I admire most are like that wise old owl who sat on the oak and kept his mouth shut and his eye on the action. (From The Things Poker Teaches by David Mamet at p. 168)


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 14, 2005 1:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Legs
Paperback
By William Kennedy


Quote:
More of the book.

More Kennedy.





Quote:
Jack mused, then with high seriousness said, "I think he's dead. But I'm not sure. If he's dead, it wasn't murder. That I am sure of."

"That's straight?"

"That's as straight as I can say it."

"Then I guess I have to believe it. Deal the cards."

He picked them up and shuffled. "Blackjack," he said and, after burying a card, dealt us both a hand. I had eighteen. He had twenty, which he showed me before I could bet. I looked blank, and he said only, "Wait," and then dealt six hands, face up. I got between thirteen and seventeen in all six. He got twenty four times and two blackjacks.

"Impressive. Are you always that lucky?"

They're marked," he said. "Never play cards with a thief." (From the chapter entitled, Johnny Raw, Jack Gentleman, at p. 93-94).


The first and probably the best of Kennedy's excellent Albany series.

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PostPosted: Mon Feb 14, 2005 1:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mr. Lucky
VHS


Quote:
More of Mr. Lucky.





Quote:
Listen to the rules of the game according to professional gambler, Joe Adams, ('Gary Grunt'):

Never give a sucker an even break and always keep an eye on a pal. Tsch, tsch. Remember that.

Never give a sucker an even break. But don't cheat a friend.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 14, 2005 5:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Inferred advice:

Legs
Paperback
By William Kennedy


Quote:
More of the book.

More - gulp! - inferred advice.





Quote:
"I dumped a guy in the water once over marked cards."

I nodded, waited. He stared out at the ocean and went on: "A card game in a hotel. It was the first time I ever met Rothstein. I was working as a strikebreaker with Little Augie, breakin' heads, just out of jail. A bum. I was a bum. Augie says to me, 'You wanna work strongarm at a card game?' And I said all right and he sent me to this hotel room and there's Rothstein, the cocksucker, and he says to me, 'What happened to your head?' 'Nothin' happened to it,' I said. 'That haircut,' he said. 'You look like a skinned rabbit, skinned by somebody who don't know how to skin. Get a haircut for pity's sake.' Can you imagine that son of a bitch? He's got seventy-six grand in his pocket, he told me so, and he tells me get a haircut. Arrogant bastard. He was right about the haircut. A barber-school job. Awful. I tell you I was a bum on the street and I looked like one. But he made me feel like a zero.

"So the game went on and there's this high roller -- let me call him Wilson -- who's challenging Rothstein. There's other players, but he wants to beat A. R., who's the king. And he's doing it. Wins eleven thousand one, eight the next, in five thousand-dollar freezeout. Rothstein has two men in the bathroom looking over the decks Wilson brought, and they find the marks, little tits on the design in the corner. First-rate work by the designer. Rothstein hears the news and calls a break but doesn't let on, and then tells me to brain Wilson if he gets out of hand, and I say all right because he's paying me. He bottom-deals Wilson a six and Wilson calls him on it. Then A. R. says never mind about bottom dealing, what about a man who brings paper into a legitimate game? And when Wilson stood up, I brained him. Didn't kill him. Just coldcocked him and he went down. When he came to, they told me to take him someplace he wouldn't be a bother. They didn't say kill him. I took him to the river with a driver and walked him to the edge of a dock. He offered me four grand, all he had left from the game, and I took it. Then I shot him three times and dumped him in." (From the chapter entitled, Johnny Raw, Jack Gentleman, at pgs. 94-95)


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 26, 2005 3:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Bookies and Bettors
Two Hundred Years of Gambling
Hardcover
By Richard Sasuly




Quote:
The casino game of blackjack presents something of a special case. The player who masters basic strategy can reduce the house edge against him to scarcely half a percentage point. This is the practical equivalent of playing the house even-up -- a great waste of time and expense for a casino that provides floor space, cards and tables, and pays the dealers' wages. Worse (for the casino), is the player who can master card counting and varies his bets at strategic moments. By dogged, gruelling work, he can actually show a small percentage of profit. Some casinos presumably bar counters from their tabes, if they detect them. And here the casinos may have created a policy problem for themselves. Conceivablly, the right of a player to use skill against a casino -- or conversely, the right of a casino to force him to rely solely on chance -- may have to be tested in the courts. In its first stages at least, controversy over card counting in blackjack may already have had two effects: (1) an increase in sales of books on how to win at blackjack, and (2) an increase in the number of players (many of them unskilled) crowding the blackjack tables. (-- pgs. 241-242)


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 03, 2005 9:15 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar
and six more
Hardcover
By British novelist Roald Dahl


Quote:
More of the book.

More of the PokerPulse ESL Gambler's Guide to Children's Literature.





Having discovered in himself, after not inconsiderable study, the rare gift of sight without using his eyes, Henry Sugar hies it to the casino. The results are staggering:

Quote:
Henry shut the front door and went back into his flt. All at once, he felt a powerful excitement stirring in his belly. He started pacing up and down, ticking off the points that would make his marvellous idea possible.

"One," he said, "I can get hold of a very large sum of money each day of my life.

"Two. I must not go to the same casino more than once every twelve months.

"Three. I must not win too much from any one casino or somebody will get suspicious. I suggest I keep it down to twenty thousand pounds a night.

"Four. Twenty thousand pounds a night for three hundred and sixty-five days in the year comes to how much?"

Henry took a pencil and paper and worked this one out.

"It comes to seven million, three hundred thousand pounds," he said aloud.

"Very well. Point number five. I shall have to keep moving. No more than two or three nights at a stretch in any one city or the word will get around. Go from London to Monte Carlo. Then to Cannes. To Biarritz. To Deauville. To Las Vegas. To Mexico City. To Buenos Aires. To Nassau. And so on.

"Six. With the money I make, I will set up an absolutely first-class orphanage in every country I visit. I will become a Robin Hood. I will take money from the bookmakers and the gambling proprietors and give it to the children. Does that sound corny and sentimental? As a dream, it does. But as a reality, if I can really make it work, it won't be corny at all, or sentimental. It would be rather tremendous.

"Seven. I will need somebody to help me, a man who will sit at home and take care of all that money and buy the houses and organize the whole thing. A money man. Someone I can trust. What about John Winston?" (-- pgs. 184-185)


Quote:
The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar
CD Audio
Narrated very nicely by British actor Martin Jarvis




Jarvis is no hell on P.G. Wodehouse but he's more than adequate here, in our view.


A classic story for old and young alike and rather more expansive than the Hundred Acre Wood, no?

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 11, 2005 10:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

In the Pond
Paperback
By Ha Jin


Quote:
More China Gambles.





Quote:
After dinner Bin was sitting outside the dormitory house, smoking and waving a fan on which spread a misty landscape -- a temple, a river, adn two slender boats, each punted by a tiny fisherman in a straw hat. His Adam's apple moved up and down while his lean face looked tense. He was deep in thought; his small eyes narrowed as the bushy brows joined. Above his head flared a 25-watt lightbulb, around which a puff of gnats were flitting, a few mosquitoes buzzing among them. The air smelled of rotten fish and fresh corn. Beyond the high wall two trucks were tooting their horns on the street, as if quarreling.

In the middle of the courtyard, Meilan was wahing bowls and dishes with an angry clatter at the faucet. Bin understood that this time he had been in the wrong. A wise man should do everything to preempt bad odds, as Meilan had told him, but he had been impervious to reason and let the bad odds multiply. Unlike his plant, the department store had only sixteen employees; it was unable to build an apartment house on its own. So his family depended on him to get decent housing, but he had blown the opportunity. Who could tell in what year a new aprtment would be available again? Heaven knew how long his family would have to live in this single room. (-- p. 7)


Then, later:

Quote:
Yen was curious to learn why the plant's leaders didn't let Bin do the propaganda work. Bin sighed and told him the whole story, from the first cartoon to his recent confrontation with them. After his account of the events, he said gloomily, "Ever since the ancient times, too big a piece of wood can't be used to make furniture. It's my fate."

"He's too stubbnorn," Meilan said to the guest. "I begged him to give in a bit just for once, but he wouldn't."

Yen said, "It's no use fighting with them all the time. I understand how you feel, Bin, but a wise man doesn't fight when the odds are against him." (-- p. 66)


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PostPosted: Mon Mar 14, 2005 1:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Goys and Dolls
The Short Stories of Damon Runyan
Hardover
Introduction by William Kennedy




Quote:
His right name is Obadiah Masterson, and he is originally out of a little town in southerm Colorado where he learns to shoot craps, and play cards, and one thing and another, and where his old man is a very well-known citizen, and something of a sport himself. In fact, The Sky tells me that when he finally cleans up all the loose scratch around his home town and decides he needs more room, his old man has a little private talk with him and says to him like this:

"Son," the old guy says, "you are now going out into the wide, wide world to make your own way, and it is a very good thing to do, as there are no more opportunities for you in this burg. I am only sorry," he says, "not having any potatoes to give you, I am now going to stake you to some very valuavble advice, which I personally collect in my years of experience around and about, and I hope and trust you will always bear this advice in mind.

"Son," the old guy says, "no matter how far you travel, or how smart you get, always remember this: Someday, somewhere," he says, "a guy is going to come to you and show you a nice brand-new deck of cards on which the seal is never broken and this guy is going to offer to bet you that the jack of spades will jump out of this deck and squirt cider in your ear. But, son," the old guy says, "do not bet him, for as sure as you do you are going to get an ear full of cider." (From The Idyll of Miss Sarah Brown at p. 14)


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2005 10:43 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

The Bingo Palace
Hardcover
By Louise Erdich


Quote:
More Gambling First Nations.





Quote:
Concentration. Before the numbers even start, she sits down in her lucky place, a chair nobody else dares take, fourth row and fourth to the right by the eastern wall. She composes her face to calm, snaps her purse shut. She shakes her daubers upside down so that the foam-rubber tips are thoroughly inked. She looks at the time on her watch. The Coke, she takes a drink of that, but no more than a sip. She is a narrow-eyed woman with a round jaw, curled hair. Her eyeglasses, blue plastic, hang from her neck by two chains. She raises the ovals to her eyes as the caller takes the stand. She holds her daubers poised while he plucks the ball from the chute. He reads it out. B-7. Then she is absorbed, scanning, dabbing into the game. She doesn't mutter. She has no lucky piece to touch in front of her. And afterward, even if she loses a blackout by one square, she never sighs or complains.

All business, that's Lulu. And all business pays. (From Chapter Seven, p. 61)


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2005 3:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Chance
A Guide to Gambling,
Love, the Stock Market &
Just About Everything Else

Hardcover
By Amir D. Aczel




Quote:
What about doubling your bets when you lose?

There is a mathematical property of sequences and series of numbers that proves that for any positive integer n, the sum of the numbers 1 + 2 + 4 + 8 +...+ n = 2n - 1. Try it: 1 + 2 = 2(2) - 1; 1 + 2 + 4 =2(4) - 1; 1 + 2 + 4 + 8 = 2 (8) - 1; and so on. When people discovered this mathematical quirk, very long ago, they saw in it a "fail-safe" method of gambling: double your bet every time you lose and eventually when you win, you'll be one chin up!...

But nothing in a casino is fail-safe, or else they'd all be out of business and coverted into retirement homes for aging mathematicians (or something). The problem with this system of bets is there's a chance the sequence of losses you incur will be so extensive you'll lose all your money and not be able to continue betting. And when that happens, your loss is liable to be enormous; doubling your money adds up fast -- by the tenth loss, assuming you're using ten-dollar chips, you'll be over ten thousand dollars in the hole. How comfortable will you feel placing twenty thousand, forty-eight dollars on a single spin of the wheel? And before you say "Ten straight losses, that'll never happen," remember what we learned from the monkeys typing Hamlet: given enough iterations, everything happens. That's why the doubling strategy is a sure-fire loser, and why Las Vegas, Monte Carlo, and Atlantic City are still in business.

But...I must admit that I have followed the doubling system and made small amounts of money. (From Random Walks and the Gambler's Ruin at pgs. 50-51)


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